A pretty lazy weekend going on here. Almost to end and back to a full busy week. Oh Boy I Can't Wait.. LOL It was nice to just relax for the weekend.
After talking to flying-kiwi tonight for a bit. She told me about Brokeback Mountain site. I was looking around for her cause she has dialup. OMG that's even hard to say.... LOL sorry... But anyway on that page there is a share your story place. Go read it. It's amazing, sad, refreshing and lots of other things rolled together. I found myself reading and reading and reading.
Had a bit of the lonelies this weekend again. I've not been too bad lately but it just kinda creeps up on me now and again and jumps me. LOL wish it was another kind of jumping but it is what it is. It's just hard still at certain times, when you are looking at the clock, checking the time seeing if it's time for a call or to be online together. After talking every single day for almost a year I guess that's just how it is. Had a few bad nights last week hopefully not this week. Sometimes I wonder if I'm still thought about but know that probably isn't the case. How does someone get over you so easily and so quickly. This is like beating a dead dog. Just need to get past this already.
Wierd how things work out in this life.
Had a very strange dream about coming out last night. I know I have a lot of dreams but I don't remember them much at all. Just bits and pieces if that. Wish sometimes I remembered more about them but I'm probably better off not.
Watched some porn this weekend. I hadn't for a long time. Just hadn't been in the mood I guess. Kinda think the real thing is much better, but may not be in the cards right now. Don't think I'm ready, my trust walls are at an all new high level. Sigh
Who is this Michael Buble and why does he sing so beautifully. I love this song. I'm wearing my iPod out on it.
Music Video Codes By HotGet.comIsn't it wierd how things look so differently and change with your state of mind. I guess that's part of being human. LOL. I've been told I'm pretty cut and dried on certain things. And I think I am to an extent. Things that happen to you in life make you question things and think differently sometimes. I guess that's learning.
Well enough for tonight. Take care and be good to each other. Thanks for listening.
Hugs,
B
