Happy New Year 2009, wow last year went so fast. So many things happened. Hopefully 2009 will be a good year. I'm looking forward to it.
Back in Tulsa this week. I'm kind of looking for a job but really gonna wait till next week. Went to the cowboy bar with my cousin, his boyfriend and my sis. It was very crowded and very smokey. My sis wanted to leave early and I was ok with it. I wasn't really feeling it anyway. Came home tonight and got online for a while. The usual sites, bear411, manhunt you know the ones. LOL Well this guy from Illinois that's on 411 wants to meet me, he keeps asking. He's about a 5 hr drive away from where I live in Iowa. He's really cute and really nice. Not sure why he picked me. I thought maybe it was a fluke but he keeps talking and asking. He's really a handsome guy, about my age, I think he is 41. He is really handsome. We'll see.
Several guys on manhunt from tulsa want to hook up. I'm kinda shocked at that too. I probably won't do hook ups for sex. If they want to go out for coffee or a movie or a beer even fine but I'm not gonna just drop over for sex. Just totally not me and not really want I want. Yea I need sex just as much as the next guy but I want it to mean something I guess. Even as horny as I get and want to. LOL
Not having a job is finally hitting home. I'm a bit depressed about it I can tell. And the stress is showing it's ugly head again. I'm gonna try not to worry too much.
I really need to make some changes I just don't know if I'll be able to afford it. Not even sure I could get much out of my house. I think I may just be making excuses. I hope not, how lame is that. I'm not letting myself make some changes I need??? Oh well story of my life I guess.
I think I'm a little down tonight. Went to the bar and saw all those couples. The guys dancing together gets to me. LOL It really does, I think it's awesome.
Well hopefully 2009 will be awesome. I'm gonna put my best foot forward no matter what, even if I'm homeless and living in seattle or on the beach in florida selling margaritta's. LOL
Hugs and thanks for listening Diary.
Boyd
